In the interests of full disclosure, I'm forced to admit an uncomfortable truth. I really don't hate mayonnaise. I don't love it, either. I'm okay with it. Is that alright?

Considering the company I keep (Joe Dredge, looking at you), it's a dangerous position to take. Nearly every human in my life is anti-mayo. My friend Rick once called it an evil substance that ruins everything it ever touches. I've thought that at least 50 percent of humanity harbors a hatred of mayo, but it turns out that might be a little high.

TwentyTwoWords.com:

According to the food sensory consultant (that's a thing?) Herbert Stone, approximately 20 percent of people don't like mayonnaise.

Seriously though, if you Google "I hate mayo" you'll get all kinds of interesting results. Things like this from BuzzFeed: "Because remember, mayo is just eggs, oil, and vinegar. It's basically egg sauce. Think about that. EGG SAUCE. Nope."

There's even a "I Hate Mayonnaise" Facebook page where you'll see gems like this one. Jägermeister and mayonnaise in a shot called "Smoker's Cough."

I Hate Mayonnaise, Facebook

If you believe that Americans are split 80-20 on mayonnaise, then it's pretty easy to understand why a big-time company like Kraft would want to find a way to turn that mayo-hating 20 percent into mayo-lovers. Who wouldn't want to see purchases of their product go up by 20 percent? Remember, this is the same company that offered Mayo, Florida $25,000 dollars to temporarily change their name to Miracle Whip, Florida (they took the money).

So how does Kraft go about breaking you of your Mayo-Phobia? Patch.com reports that beginning on April 8th, you'll be able to enter for a chance to win a limited-edition Overcoming Mayophobia Kit:

 

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