Charles Bramesco

Though Michael B. Jordan was the breakout star of Creed as Apollo Creed’s rip-snorting fighter son Adonis, Sylvester Stallone got the best material (and the Oscar nomination). His arc saw aging boxer Rocky Balboa coping with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma, mourning the loss of his friends and loved ones, and ultimately confronting his own mortality. It was meaty stuff, ending on a note of hope and rehabilitation as Rocky scaled the famed Philly steps once again, a bit worse for wear but still tough as nails. Stallone recently spoke out about his plans for the character in the impending Creed sequel, and with Rocky’s health back on the upswing, it looks like the Italian Stallion may have some fight left in him.

Oliver Stone gravitates towards controversial figures like a moth to a headline-grabbing flame. He’s taken aim at former and sitting Presidents, serial killers, self-proclaimed warrior-poets, and most recently, a Kermit the Frog-voiced whistleblower by the name of Eddie Snowden. One of the most wanted men on the face of the Earth, Snowden’s a pretty tough act for a scandal-courting filmmaker to follow. Laura Poitras managed to score some precious face-time with Wikileaks founder Julian Assange for Risk, her first feature after Snowden doc Citizenfour. Not to be outdone, Oliver Stone landed four interviews with one of the primary architects of what could end up being our next world war.

[Taylor Swift voice] John Carpenter never goes out of style. The master filmmaker influenced a generation of movie nerds with his hyper-competent, crowd-pleasing genre pictures such as Halloween, The Thing, and They Live. His fingerprints are all over the modern horror canon, with his synths-and-neon aesthetic informing everything from Stranger Things to the widely under-appreciated The Guest. The latest film to kowtow to the Carpenter’s far-reaching legacy is The Void, a new chiller than many readily compared to The Thing when it debuted at Texas’ Fantastic Fest last fall. And with a new trailer available today, viewers can start to judge that for themselves.

Forcing audiences to watch a movie in which a dog lives, finds true happiness, and then dies over and over again would’ve been an act of sadism all on its own. But the crew of the upcoming family film A Dog’s Purpose have recently been outed as sadists of another, more stomach-churning sort. TMZ posted a shocking video from a second-unit shoot for the film in which an animal handler forces a reluctant German Shepard into rushing waters, the dog begins drowning, and handlers rush to retrieve the animal amid cries of “cut it! cut it!” PETA has already called for a boycott of the film, with the most shame heaped upon the industry supplier Birds & Animals Unlimited, and the rest of the fallout has been swift.

Schwing! Party time! Excellent! We‘re not worthy, we’re not worthy!

Now that falsehoods have become almost entirely indistinguishable from fact in the American news media, the staffers of satirical publication The Onion can sit back and relax, having effectively taken over the industry they set out to spoof. (Full disclosure: I contribute to the A.V. Club, a division of the Onion media empire.) But instead of resting on their laurels, the originators of ‘fake news’ have set out to conquer new frontiers, having already moved into publishing and the untamed wilds of television. A new exclusive from the Hollywood Reporter indicates that not even the movie theaters of this great nation will be safe from the increasingly plausible absurdities of America’s self-proclaimed ‘finest news source.’

A few days from now, January 10 will mark the one-year anniversary of David Bowie’s surprising death and the beginning of the unending parade of horrors that was 2016. The tributes poured out in the wake of the announcement with commemorative parades and parties taking place in cities across the globe. But while the flow of memorials to the musical pioneer may have ebbed, it hasn’t stopped completely. A new report from Variety indicates that later this year, Bowie’s spirit will continue to live on at cineplexes across Europe with what is now the closest a person can get to attending an actual David Bowie concert.

You gotta respect Robert Redford’s style. He’s not one of those interminable wafflers like Quentin Tarantino or Michael Jordan, constantly announcing and then un-announcing retirement every few years to shore up relevancy when necessary. Robert Redford says he’s gonna do a job, he does the job. He says he’s gonna finish up the two acting gigs he’s already taken and then shift to full-time direction, you can be sure he’s not gonna pop up in a couple years with a “gotcha!” and news of a new role.

We were all so busy scrambling to avert one apocalypse today, we didn’t even see another one rearing its head in the distance. SlashFilm recently spoke to power-producer David Heyman at the junket for Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, and questioned the Hollywood player about the plans for Warner Bros.’ impending Willy Wonka film. Without making any concrete announcements about what to expect from the early-in-development project, Heyman did drop one rather ominous prophecy when asked whether the script would be a remake of the popular Gene Wilder-starring film or the Tim Burton-directed version.

Come Christmastime, there’s nothing quite like sharing in the generous Yuletide spirit by singing a few carols, trading presents, and getting completely wasteycakes-drunk with all your favorite coworkers. Unrestrained bacchanalian debauchery is the reason for the season this year in the Office Christmas Party trailer, picking up where the drug-fueled shenanigans of last year's The Night Before left off. Pour yourself a glass of eggnog, spike it with some additional alcohol, pop a tab of Ecstasy in there if you're feeling particularly merry, and buckle up for the bumpiest sleigh ride of the year.