20 Ways The Class of 2019 Will Make You Feel Old

Each year since August of 1998, The Beloit College releases a Mindset List, taking a look at the cultural touchstones that shape the lives of students entering college this fall. Tom McBride, Charles Westerberg and Ron Nief are the annual creators of this list.

This year, most students are 18 years of age and were born in 1997.

That statement right there makes me feel old. In 1997, I graduated eighth grade. Captain Jack got married in 1997.

Wow. Here are 20 of the 50 statements made on the Beloit College Mindset List, guaranteed to make you feel old:

1. Hybrid automobiles have always been mass produced.

This one blew my mind. I can't believe hybrid's have been around for 18 years already!

2. They have never licked a postage stamp.

Lucky for you Class of 2019! You have no idea the horrific taste of licking more than one postage stamp in a row. Now you can just peel and stick.

3. Email has become the new “formal” communication, while texts and tweets remain enclaves for the casual.

I thought my pager was cool!

4. Four foul-mouthed kids have always been playing in South Park.

Those kids should have graduated by now.

5. They have grown up treating Wi-Fi as an entitlement. 

The sounds of dial up internet will always be burned inside my brain.

6. Charlton Heston is recognized for waving a rifle over his head as much as for waving his staff over the Red Sea.

The Ten Commandments will always be a staple in my house on Easter.

7. Cell phones have become so ubiquitous in class that teachers don’t know which students are using them to take notes and which ones are planning a party.

Party. Cell phones in class are always for a party. Unless they are texting the answers to the test to their friends.

8. Their parents have gone from encouraging them to use the Internet to begging them to get off it.   

Preach.    

9. If you say “around the turn of the century,” they may well ask you, “which one?”

Ouch, now that's not even funny.

10. They have avidly joined Harry Potter, Ron, and Hermione as they built their reading skills through all seven volumes.

Am I the only person over the age of 18 who has never read these? Movies weren't bad though.

11. Attempts at human cloning have never been federally funded but do require FDA approval.

Whatever happened to that sheep?

12. Phish Food has always been available from Ben and Jerry.

For the record, Phish food is the best.

13. When they were born, cell phone usage was so expensive that families only used their large phones, usually in cars, for emergencies. 

One time I had a $1,400 cell phone bill. Thanks roaming.

14. Teachers have always had to insist that term papers employ sources in addition to those found online. 

Curse you card catalogs and encyclopedias.

15. Playhouse Disney was a place where they could play growing up.

Wait, Disney had a playhouse?

16. Surgeons have always used “super glue” in the operating room.

Just slap a little glue on it. You'll be fine.

17. At least Mom and Dad had their new Nintendo 64 to help them get through long nights sitting up with the baby.

Diddy Kong is the greatest game ever.

18. Sir Paul and Sir Elton have always been knights of the same musical roundtable.

Ahem... and some of the greatest rockers on the planet, thank you.

19. Splenda has always been a sweet option in the U.S.

There was nothing wrong with the pink, white and blue. When did yellow get here?

20. TV has always been in such high definition that they could see the pores of actors and the grimaces of quarterbacks. 

"Lori, get up and change the channel," will always be embedded in my brain.

Ugh, I feel old. You can read the full Beloit College Mindset List HERE.